On Changes + Choices
Everything is changing. Constantly. Our whole universe is in a state of flux. New stars are being born. Others are burning out. The cells in our bodies are constantly moving, changing, dying. Plants and trees, the seasons. Everything is changing. Every moment.
Our thoughts & emotions are changing as well. We have 50,000 to 70,000 thoughts a day in our heads. Our likes, our dislikes change over time. The clothes we wear. The music we listen to and the movies we enjoy. Who we spend our time with changes. Friends come and go. What we choose to spend our money on changes.
What do all these changes mean for living a life filled with meaning?
I've been thinking about this a lot lately. I've shared the struggles in my life before. How 2 of my 3 kids have recently been diagnosed with cystic fibrosis, Jenny's twin brother's sudden death a month ago, the stressful life of finances and bill paying when you're self employed, dealing with health care when you have a son who's been sick for 2 years.
Stress after stress after stress. Hard thing after hard thing after hard thing. Lots of grief. A yearning for a long period of rest and stability. Feeling hopeless at times. Having a hard time finding the light and the purpose of all of these trials.
Everything is changing. With all this change comes opportunity. Every single moment is an opportunity to determine the next step. Every moment, I get to choose where I'll go. Every moment, I get to choose what thoughts to believe, and what thoughts to let go of. Every moment, I get to choose where I'll act from, a place of love? Or a place of fear?
I have the choice, always, and no matter the hard things that keep coming up in my life, I always have a choice. Nothing can ever take that choice away from me.
All of our thoughts, actions and words produce a result, sometimes positive, sometimes negative. But everything, every single thing, begins with a thought. Our thoughts plant seeds that result in actions. And our intentions feed our seeds. Negative intentions will never lead to positive results.
If I'm being completely honest here, I've been making choices based on fear and anger. Fear and anger will not lead to positive results, ever. Now, I know my heart is good, but I've been telling myself lately that I'm not strong enough, or not courageous enough to do the hard work that is necessary to push through this difficult time in my life. Thinking of myself as not _______ enough is, in itself, planting a seed with a negative intention. It will never, ever yield a positive result. What would my life look like if I started replacing negative actions and thoughts with positive ones?
Knowing this, I have 2 options. I can keep doing the same things I've been doing. Listening to the same crappy thoughts with crappy intentions, which will yield the same crappy results. Or I can make the choice to change. I can choose to let go of the "not _______ enoughs" and plant seeds full of positive intentions. I can focus on love, and all the things that are good in my life. Yes, there are some hard things I'm going through, but we are all fighting our own battles in life. No one walks through life without any struggles.
To bring it all full circle, everything is changing, yes. That means this string of tough stuff that's been in my life for the last two and a half years will eventually change and go away as well. At some point, I will work through all of it, and things will start to look a whole lot brighter for me. If this is true, isn't it my responsibility, to myself and my family, to start planting those positive seeds right now?
What seeds do you need to start planting in your life?
Did this post resonate with you? If so, I'd love it if you shared with a friend or wherever your heart desires. When we embrace vulnerability together, we all get better.